Tip goddamit!

I have heard it said that a man of great character is not judged by how he treats his peers but by how he treats those who serve him.

Everyday as you go around there are of course people who serve you, that conductor who collects fare in the loud matatu, the nice lady at breakfast, that tall janitor who cleans your office floor, your housemaid if you have any, the watchman who watches over your building as you sleep…the list of people who serve you is long and it gets longer the wealthier you are.

While some of these people may be arrogant, unhelpful and sometimes downright rude, there are those that do their service to you and humanity diligently and with a smile. There are those that in giving their service to you will do it so happily (be it genuine or faked) that it will Leave you with a Smile as well and make your day.

And so to you I ask WHY YOU NO TIP THEM? 

Tipping is not very Kenyan, here we believe that we should not pay anyone extra for doing their job, besides, what money will we have left to bribe policemen and government officials?  Okay, maybe that was below the belt but for a country that bribes so much, I fail to see why so many of us are so against tipping. 

And don’t you even try denying it in your mind. My friends, some who are reading this, cant even leave 20 shilling change with the waitress at the club, the fact that they’ve spent thousands there not withstanding. Yes you, you know yourself…especially you whose name starts with Z, yes you who sent me a mother’s day text message yesterday, yes you who…okay, I’ll stop now.

I have recently taken up tipping those who serve me well and gladly not because I have tones of money but because that 100 shilling note might not mean much to you but might mean the world to someone else. And if they are doing their job well, why not appreciate it and not with just a thank you but with something that will help the other person and encourage them to be even nicer to other people. A good tip is a kind reward for a job well done.

There is no doubt that servers give good service based on what they perceive to be a carrot on the end of a stick. This means that if those who serve you know you tip well, chances of getting better service incredibly increase.

Other than the above, there are a lot of reasons to tip, in most parts of the world it is dictated by etiquette that you tip about 10-20 % of the cost of the service you are receiving depending on which part of the world you are in, it is expected of you.

Sometimes when a motorbike guy carries me home from school and riddles me with stories I tip more because I have been entertained...

I know we have all had our fair share of that waitress who thinks you are piece of shit and will take your order while looking out the window or filling  her nails. And god forbids you should ask why your pilau is taking so long or complain that the tea is too watery. The look and tongue lashing you get will lead you to quickly evaluate your life (kujifikiria kimaisha) to ensure that you have it right and that you are indeed the customer and not the server.

As far as these kinds are concerned, by all means do not leave a single shilling in change and if you can, do make away without paying the bill so that she is later charged for your meal because she deserves it and you are freaking Robin Hood (winning!). I get everyone has bad days; however, this should never be taken out on the customer.

But when people are good to you, why not be good to them? This past Friday. Me and Deksta, a friend and a business partner were having a couple of beers at the prestige plaza food court after work and were served by the most delightful gentleman. The gentleman, a waiter  at one of the food stands there, was at least 50 years hold, neatly dressed in a clean black shirt and pants. His shoes just like his attitude were well polished.

Not minding that we were both more than half his age, he served us our drinks with a wide smile, courtesy and kindness. He enquired about the temperature and constantly passed by politely asking if we needed refills, he poured our glasses and when my phone ran out of charge, he took it to his counter instead of the public charging system bringing it back promptly when I needed it.

At one point, he got my drink wrong but he had been so nice to us that it felt wrong to have him take it back. When you do encounter people like this, leave them a token of appreciation.

This post is for that nice man at prestige plaza.

The Beggar in a Red Expensive Shirt

A few years back, I lived with a cousin who everyday from work, would always bring home a handkerchief or two. Every day without fail he would always have new handkerchiefs. Everybody just thought he liked them and of course no one minded it because we did not have to buy any ourselves.

The habit got me curious though, and I asked him why he bought so many damn handkerchiefs.

What he told me, is something that has not escaped my mind to this day. He explained that on the road from his office to where he would have lunch, there was always a smartly dressed blind man who sold handkerchiefs for a living. The blind man would be at his spot every day whether it was sunny or rainy. He used the money he made from the sale of his handkerchiefs to cater for his living and provide for his family.

My cousin went on to explain that almost everybody he knew from his office and the neighboring offices would make a point to pass there and promote the blind man. He further explained that they did not do it out of pity or because they needed all those handkerchiefs but because they felt they needed to support the man’s course. Because unlike most disabled people, he just didn’t wake up every morning to go beg, he instead tried to do something little to fend for himself and provide for his family. My cousin also noted that he seemed to make quite a good amount of money from it.

 Most cities in the world and the third world more so, are riddled with beggars. In Nairobi although the situation is getting better, there are beggars at almost every corner. It would be absolutely absurd to dismiss these people because some of them are genuinely unable to fend for themselves due to one reason or the other. Most of them live miserably having to beg for food and money to meet very basic needs.  I feel it would be unfair to generally judge them or term them lazy or unproductive and therefore I shall not.

I however have a bone to pick with one specific beggar. There is a man who I have spotted at the corner right opposite Imenti house on Moi Avenue. Now this gentleman is crippled and has to use a wheelchair. From what I have observed he is in his 20’s and cannot use his legs from the knees down. I can tell this because although his upper body is well built and quite able, he kneels at his begging spot.

Martina Navratilova says that Disability is a matter of perception. If you can do just one thing well, you're needed by someone.  I would think the man who is quite able from knee upwards would have some form of work, hawking even. Anyway, that is not my point.

Whenever I pass by there I always find the man, knelt on a mat or a pair of shoes. His wheelchair is safely and conveniently parked closely behind him. He always leans on a parking pole comfortably with one of his hands outstretched for your coin and his other hand on his mobile phone. More often than not you will find him chatting away with a friend.

My problem with this nice gentleman is not his age, his mat, his wheelchair, his disability or even his friend. My problem with him is his dressing.

Yes his dressing. The clothes he wears.

I am not a fashion man myself and I presume I have less than a good taste in clothes. I do not try to keep up with trends either, but I believe I follow them through observation and reading. For more than three years now, I have observed this gentleman and I can say without a single doubt that this man has kept up and still is keeping up with every passing fashion trend.

I would go on to describe these trends and name them but I might not be very well informed and might run the risk of exposing my ignorance. So I’ll say that any trend that has come up in the last three years, this man has kept up with it. Am not talking about cheap clothes that people buy in second hand stalls, no, am talking expensive shirts, t shirts, jeans  and jackets. The kind you buy at exhibition stalls for several thousands.

Now of course I am not trying to say that disabled people should not be fashion conscious on the contrary I think everybody should dress well. So here is my problem with the gentleman; WHY WOULD ANYONE WHO CAN AFFORD AN EXPENSIVE SHIRT,  BEG?

Myself, am the simple kind and I don’t necessarily spend much on clothes so you can guess that the man out dresses me by far. Anyone who can buy an expensive knock-off Gucci shirt does not need my 20 shillings surely. Most working Kenyans do not buy these expensive clothes not because they do not have the money but because they spend the money on food accommodation and anything else that will ensure they do not have to beg.

Beggars are people too, and do not get me wrong am not saying they should not dress well, but here is my question…why should I give you my hard earned money, to go buy clothes that I cannot afford to wear myself?

It is my thinking that people who beg are genuinely in need of basic human needs…food and shelter at best. Last I checked expensive knock-off clothes are not part of these basic human needs. I think it is wrong for this man and others like him to take money given to them out of kindness and human compassion and spend it on such things. If anything, I think this specific gentleman is capable of finding some form of work and making enough to even buy original Gucci shirts.

So I, good sir will not contribute my 20 shillings to your wardrobe money. 20 shillings in fact, is enough to buy a handkerchief from a certain blind man in industrial area.

Also next time you want to keep up with the latest male trends, do pass by Moi Avenue house opposite imenti house at the corner where 17b matatus pick and say halo to the beggar with a red knock-off Gucci shirt.

  

"I have not been handicapped by my condition. I am physically challenged and differently able." - Janet Barnes

Halo Baby

Chemistry between me and you

Has been on since day one

You understood my every mood

When I was into Hurricane Chris

And other not very intelligent music

When I was trying to find myself

Trying to find out what my deal was

You walked with me when I was meant to walk alone

When I had nothing to say

You sat there patiently with me

Sabuni wangu wa moyo

When the whole world seemed against me

You were there, black and not giving a damn

When I discovered long walks

And evening bike rides

And India Arie and Tracy Chapman and mellow music

When I dreamt of owning a computer

When I was in love

And when my heart broke

When I thought of moving out

And rode out to that escarpment and decided on it

When they turned me down and said no

When I rose up to it and got strength

When I slept there on the floor

You speaking to me on the SP 525’s

When they placed a gun on my head

And I needed to cry.

On long journeys and finding myself

When lights were out

When I dint feel like speaking to any one

When I wanted to walk alone

But with you by my side

When I needed clearance of mind

When I needed silence and sweet melodies

For you I got three guys to spend several nights

In a police cell

And I would do it all over again

Because I love you more

I love you more than

 I could love anything

Nashukuru kwa hayo kidogo angalau

Kwa sababu kuna wengi hawana

Naenda home kwa Yule huinipa kile  nimekosa

When I make wrong decisions

When I fail people I care about

You don’t judge or look at me wrong

You just do as I say

Na hiyo ndio sababu ya wengine wote kukosa maana

I take you everywhere I go

Ndio moja kati yamengi nafurahia kukuhusu

Natarajia makubwa mpaka wengine waniona zuzu

You are the reason nime-hold on to life

Ndio maana sijaanguka

Wanasongamana, wengine wanabonga sana

Wanatupa tu masaa juu milele hatutaachana

And I might go touch, go more tech

But it’s never a replacement for you

Coz wewe ni sabuni wangu wa moyo na hautawai iisha

We ni dame poa sana  tena sana

We ndio sababu ya wengine wote kukosa maana

Nina pendo kubwa aniingoja mahali

Mrembo GB nane

Siwezi kusahau juu bado hujanichosha

Naja kwako unipe nilichokosa

Halo baby…

For LUCY, my ipod nano

Inspired by Chiwawa’s  “hey baby”