Dear 13 year old Eugene,
Hi there youngin, seeing that it’s
Friday morning and a holiday you are probably doing chores as those
you live with laugh and watch TV. I know as you go about them you are
day dreaming of when you live in your own space with no rules where
you can wallow all day in your filth drinking all the milk in the
world with no one breathing down your back.
You won’t get there immediately but
hey, just a couple of months more and you’ll be in boarding school
and while it won’t be the best escape, there you’ll exercise your
mind and chores will be evenly divided. Finishing KCPE won’t be as
cool as it’s hyped to be. I know you don’t have as many friends
in your primary as you would want to be and I know your reasons fro
keeping to yourself. Just hold on to your guns you don’t have to be
nice to them, you’ll never encounter most of them again.
Your KCPE week will be hell on earth
and nothing I can say can possibly prepare you for the shit that’s
coming your fucking way from you know who (oh also as much as you
disagree with it you’ll pick up cursing). But not to worry too
much, the exam will be a walkover, you’ll leave soon after and
there’ll be a trip to the coast that will just blow you mind.
Unfortunately you’ll come right back
to reality and you won’t enjoy the first few weeks of 2005 and then
high school will come.
High school will be good to you; not in
the orthodox way but it will change your self esteem and perception
of yourself greatly. You have already developed sarcasm from all
those books you’ve been reading and it will get you into a lot of
trouble with bullies.
You’ll try to fit in but not for
long, you’ll get into drama club and it’s the best thing that’ll
happen to you. You’ll get a major role in form one, make tones of
friends, hit on girls, go for endless trips and while you won’t be
popular per say, people will have a sense of respect for you. You’ll
go into intensive novel reading and your grades will suffer for it.
At start of form three you’ll have a
total fall out with Uncle C and the upper hill admin concerning a
mobile phone, extended midterm and some dirty texts. You’ll run
away to Mombasa for a couple of days and come back a changed person.
It will be a shitty experience but it will change your life forever.
You will find a new you. Ma will start paying more attention to you.
Uncle Eddy and his wife will take you in and be very kind to you.
Uncle Eddy will give you a chance to
find a school for yourself, his wife will treat you like her own
child, you’ll speak to ma often and you’ll be happy. You’ll
find a somewhat absurd mixed high school where you will be king.
You’ll take up stylish dressing, hair relaxing, nice colognes and
expensive shoes. You’ll be a hit with the ladies. You’ll get the
prettiest girls in the class and it will get you in trouble but Uncle
Eddy will be graceful about it.
Unfortunately Uncle Eddy will be
bed-ridden for a while and then succumb to diabetes. You’ll be with
him, taking care of him with aunty most of the way and it will
destroy you. But you have good friends and a nice chick. They’ll be
there for you and it will be easier. Ma will fly in and you’ll
spend some good time with her shopping for nice things and catching
up.
You’ll finish high school top of your
class and school and get into a computer college and then to
university, and guess what…you are nothing close to being a lawyer.
You’ll take up journalism after a stint in several local
productions. Cool eh?
You first semester in university will
be shit. You’ll fall out with family, you’ll get fired from your
ka-job, you’ll be dead broke and the girl you love will dump you
and hurt you so bad you’ll not leave the house for days and it’ll
hurt for months.
You’ll overcome it and things will
look up from then, you’ll meet beautiful people in high school and
college and have the greatest friends on earth who’ll be there for
you through a lot. Also you’ll do business with some of them so you
won’t be so broke.
So you see 13 year old Eugene things
won’t turn out so bad. For now just sit tight and take their shit.
You’ll turn out happier and bigger than them, you know who. There’s
that nice Swahili lady Sophia from downstairs who always treats you
kind and encourages you when things are too hard. She is unwell and
won’t be around for much longer. Remember to thank her every chance
you have.
I know you are very low on hope right
now but there is a nice gentleman from second floor who will walk you
to school one of this mornings. He’s seen your suffering. He’ll
share his umbrella and his story. His words will be the pillar of
your strength for many years after. He will rekindle your faith in
humanity.
Keep reading those books you are
reading and keep dreaming. Don’t worry about not having any friends
now; you’ll do fine without them and you’ll be quite popular with
the ladies in a few years thanks to those books you’re reading now.
Don’t worry about the chores either
because you know what, I, the 21 year old you is writing this naked
in bed, in my own fairly big house, I have several big flat screen
TV’s and video games, computers and other gadgets, I haven’t done
my own laundry in ages, I have money in the bank and best of all not
a soul on earth to tell me what to do or when to do it. Hell, I stay
out all night lots of nights.
You are kind and respectful to people,
keep it that way. Over the years you will loose faith in a lot of
things you believe in right now. A lot of people you think are with
you will let you down. People you trust will turn against you when
you least expect it but don’t let that put you down and always
learn to rise from it. You’ve never been in a physical fight and do
not ever let yourself get into one because you are better than that
and also because you are not so strong physically and you ass will be
whooped. There’ll be moments, but always walk away.
You are developing a liking for music
and very soon you will get an iPod that will walk with you through
everything for many years to come. Be patient and don’t ever let
despair and anger ever get the best of you. You are also very naïve
and believe in the good in people. If you can don’t give that
ungrateful bastard from high school your guitar. He’ll insult you
when you ask for it and you’ll never get it back.
Remember the fall out with Uncle C that
I mentioned earlier? Don’t worry about it…it will get better and
you will come to have a very good relationship with him based on
mutual respect and trust. Try hard not to let him down when you can
help it.
Okay get back to your chores now before
you get in trouble. Remember, it’s alright to keep to yourself and
with a bit of resilience you’ll overcome anything. Treat Tracy well
because she has no fault in what you are going through.
I cannot emphasize enough the need for
you to be kind to people and to not ever let your frustrations or
anger be let out on anyone who does not deserve it. Intellect and
clear thinking is better than any physical confrontation. Do not
allow yourself to follow the crowd, walk your own path instead no
matter how lonesome.
Tell Ma everyday how much you love her
and do not ever for a minute take her struggle and those who care
about you for granted. Do your best to make them proud always.
Take the shit now but everything will
be okay just hold on in there. Soon you’ll be me; awesome and free
and with all the milk you want. Just hold on in there and wipe that
frown from your face. When you are done with your chores pick up your
novel and your drawing book and just hold on in there. Better days
ahead.
Oh and Eugene, how do you feel about
film making, tattoos, dreadlocks and vodka?
Oh…Okay…never mind.
From me
21 year old Eugene
(Also, the call you Nude-man
now…don’t ask)
